Have you ever had one of those performances where everything just… falls apart?
You practice, you prepare, you put in the work. But when the moment comes—when you step onto that stage—your confidence disappears. Your hands shake, your thoughts spiral, and suddenly, all that preparation feels like it was for nothing.
And afterward, the doubts creep in:"Why can’t I just feel confident?""Why does it seem so easy for everyone else?""Maybe I’m just not a naturally confident person."
If any of that sounds familiar, you’re not alone. And more importantly—it’s not your fault.
There’s so much misinformation about confidence floating around, and if you’re unknowingly believing these myths, you’re probably making confidence way harder than it needs to be. But the good news? Once you start recognizing these myths for what they are, everything changes.
Let’s talk about what confidence really is—and what it isn’t.
5 Myths That Are Destroying Your Confidence
1. “Confidence is something you’re born with.”
It’s easy to look at certain musicians and assume they’re just naturally confident. But the truth? Confidence isn’t something you have—it’s something you build.
Think of it like a skill. Just like you train your technique, you train your confidence through how you practice, how you respond to mistakes, and how you interpret your experiences.
2. “If I were really confident, I’d feel that way all the time.”
Nope. Even the most seasoned performers have moments of doubt. Confidence isn’t about never feeling nervous—it’s about knowing that even when nerves show up, you can still perform at your best.
Confidence isn’t an on-off switch. It fluctuates. And that’s okay.
3. “Once I build confidence, I’ll have it forever.”
Confidence isn’t something you achieve once and keep forever. It’s like physical fitness—if you stop training, it fades. That’s why even the most accomplished musicians continually work on their mindset.
If you want lasting confidence, you have to maintain it.
4. “Achievements = Confidence.”
Winning an audition or getting a great review feels amazing—but external success alone won’t make you confident.
Why? Because confidence isn’t about what happens—it’s about how you process what happens.
If you don’t allow yourself to fully absorb and own your achievements, confidence won’t stick. That’s why some of the most successful musicians still struggle with self-doubt.
5. “Mistakes destroy confidence.”
Only if you let them.
Mistakes are actually one of the best ways to build confidence—if you use them correctly. Instead of seeing mistakes as proof that you’re not good enough, see them as proof that you’re learning.
The most confident musicians aren’t the ones who never fail. They’re the ones who know how to bounce back.
How This Shift Changes Everything
I worked with a client who completely lost confidence after a big concert didn’t go well. She told me, “If I were truly confident, I wouldn’t have struggled.”
We broke everything down—her preparation, her practice routine, her mindset before the performance. And you know what we discovered?
Her confidence wasn’t gone. She was just interpreting that one performance as proof that she wasn’t good enough.
We worked on reframing her mindset—shifting from “this proves I’m not confident” to “this is an opportunity to strengthen my confidence.”
And over time? That shift changed everything about how she showed up on stage.
Try This Today: Train Your Brain to See Success
If you want to start building confidence, try this simple (but powerful) exercise:
Before your next practice session, write down three things you’ve done well recently.
It can be small—something as simple as:✔️ I played that shift cleanly.✔️ I stayed focused during my scales.✔️ I kept my rhythm steady.
This might sound too easy, but don’t skip it.
By training your brain to recognize success—rather than just focusing on mistakes—you start rewiring your mindset. And the more you do this, the easier it gets.
Try this every day for a week, and see if you start feeling a shift in your confidence.
Want to Go Deeper?
Confidence isn’t something you have to figure out alone.
Inside The Music Mastery Experience, I help musicians break free from these limiting beliefs, train their mindset, and develop real, lasting confidence—so they can step on stage knowing they’re ready.
Doors to MME open soon, and if you join the waitlist, you’ll be the first to know (and get access to exclusive perks)!
👉 Join the waitlist HERE
And if confidence has been holding you back, let’s talk. Book a free discovery call HERE.
Because confidence isn’t magic. It’s not about luck. And it’s not about talent.
It’s about how you train your mind.
And the best part? The more you work on it, the stronger it gets.
You’ve got this.
(BTW, you can listen to this blog post in Episode 218 of the Mind Over Finger Podcast - available everywhere you listen to you favorite shows.)
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